Potato | Food Final Frontier

My family is a strange mix of Catholic, Jewish, Atheist, and some form of Protestant. This Easter we decided to abandon the Jesus worship and hit up the Old Testament with a good old-fashioned Seder.

Don’t get me wrong; I love a good Cadbury egg as much as the next Anglican (I still packed these away with gusto, never fear). But every now and then we all appreciate the guttural tones of Hebrew chanting before we dive into strange dishes like Gefilte fish and potato kugel.

The question on every Gentile’s mind: what is Gefilte Fish?

I embrace my ignorance on this front and gladly pass this jar to my neighbor. Does anyone really know the answer? Does anyone really want to know the answer? Does anyone want to just, you know, toss it casually into the dumpster?

Why, yes. Yes I do. And what the hey is jellied broth?
Don’t tell me; it was a hypothetical-ish question.

I’m going to focus on my sister’s deeeeelighful rendition of “Off the Broiler’s” Potato Kugel, since it was not only tasty but completely without balled-up fish of any kind. So put on your pray shawls and adjust your yamulke; it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!

This little lady has been trying to overthrow my position as the culinary sister, so maybe you can help me out by letting her know it’s never going to happen. Or maybe I should just throw her one of these and assume she’ll back off:

What a mug! She sure is fearsome in her fleece coat with lots of drool hanging down in ropes from her over-sized yapper.

The full recipe from the Broiler folks can be found here, and this is what you’ll need:

1/2 cup Parsley Leaves
4 medium yellow onions
1/2 cup Schmaltz (mmm chicken fat; we just used butter)
7 Eggs
2 tsp Salt
3/4 tsp freshly ground pepper
1 cup Carrots, peeled and shredded
4 lbs yukon gold potatoes
2/3 cup Matzo Meal
1/2 tsp baking powder

Put the slicing blade on the food processor and process 3 of the onions. Caramelize them over medium heat using half of the butter.

Meanwhile, beat the eggs in a large bowl.

Mince the parsley in the food processor with the regular blade. Add one of the onions and pulse until thoroughly demolished. Add this to the eggs and mix.

Rinse, scrub, and quarter your potatoes. Place them in a bowl of cold water until the onions are caramelized so they do not brown.

Shred the carrots and add them to the egg mixture, along with your Matzo crumbs, baking powder, salt and pepper.

If the onions are close to being all brown and lovely, you can go ahead and shred the potatoes. Please use the Cuisinart for this, unless you have some weird need to hate life by the end of this Seder.

See how happy she is using that wonderful machine? Don’t you want to be that ecstatic about potatoes? Now, mix everything together!

Grease up a 13’x9′ pan and add some butter, just for the heck of it:

Express skepticism:

“That’s not how my grandmother made it.”
Now you can bake this puppy at 375 for about 60-90 minutes, depending on your oven and how brown you want it.

The entire menu was composed of lamb roast, matzoh ball soup, lots and lots of wine, almond torte, roasted cauliflower and beans, and this lovely kugel. And there I was thinking Jewish food was a hair shy of tasty!
*Nom*

It’s less boring than it sounds. My trusty associates and I decided to embark on an adventure of epic proportions for this week’s culinary delight: Gnocchi.

Topped with Tomato-Cream sauce and Arugula. Major noms!

I know what you’re thinking: WAY too difficult, especially when you can get it premade in stores! Duh, Elspeth. Duh.

But this is a great dish to make with people you like (not recommended for people you hate, who might get a hot potato to the face) at interactive dinner parties and family soirees. Again, I know what you’re thinking: what if I don’t like my family?

That’s another fish to fry.

I’m going to leave the Tomato-Cream sauce for another post, since the gnocchi is somewhat labor intensive and will take my full attention here. It could use some mild tweaking, but even more important is the fact that I didn’t take enough pictures to demonstrate properly…oops!

So ready, set, NOM!

You will need:
2 lbs russet potatoes, rinsed (you will be removing the skins, so don’t stress yourself about scrubbing the living daylights out of the poor spuds)
1.25-2 cups flour
1 t salt

Bake the potatoes in a 400 degree oven for 45min-1 hr, until you can skewer them easily with a knife or samurai sword.

Using a reliable oven mitt, a paring knife, and some dexterity, remove the skins and discard. Press the tatoes through a ricer or mash them with a smush-masher-thing.

A ricer is the best option because it gives you the fluffiest, lightest result; however, not everyone is as well-prepared as my friend Lauren with kitchen gadgets, so don’t fret if you are missing this piece of equipment. Spontaneity is always fun in the kitchen!

Like when Luci demonstrated, for our pre-gnocchi snack, how good traditional bruschetta can be with a little melted mozzerella and sauteed tomato-mixture:

From scary/sassy…

To tasty:

Mmmm a sea of fresh basil and yummies.

Back to the tots!

Spread out on a cookie sheet and let them cool for about 15 minutes, until you are able to touch them without reaching for the aloe with tears in your eyes.

Take this opportunity to get a big pot of water on the stove and light a fire under that sucker. Salt the water liberally.

Sprinkle 1 1/4 cups flour and the salt over the potato mash and mix together with your hands, until it forms a cohesive mass. Do NOT over-knead!

When your hands are full of gummy, messy potato dough you can watch as your friend takes the last bruschetta:

Wipe back tears as she gives you a mocking, but strangely winning, smirk:

What. A. Jerk.

So now you’ve got a pile of dough. Congratulations.

If it is excessively sticky you’ll want to add some more flour. We ended up using about 1.75 cups of flour, plus more for dusting the work surface.

Take a pinch of dough (3/4 inch ball) and throw it in the water. When it rises to the top, remove it with a slotted spoon and run a taste-test. If it is too gummy or mushy you should add more flour to your dough (a couple of tablespoons). If it’s perfect, then proceed to the next step.

Now for the fun part!

Grab about 1 cup of dough and lightly smush it with your hands so it is a cohesive lump. Working from the center of the lump out, start rolling the dough into a long rope. You will have to evenly apply pressure with your fingers and move your hands along the rope so that it’s not fat and ugly on one end.

You should end up with a bunch of ropes that are about 3/4 inch thick. Cut the ropes into 3/4-1inch pieces.

Now comes the part that takes a bit of practice. Take a fork in your non-dominant hand and hold the gnocchi at the base of the prongs with the middle section of your dominant-hand thumb. Roll the gnocchi towards the edge of the prongs so you create ridges on one side and a little dent from the tip of your thumb. This is the “sauce catcher”.

As you will see during the consumption portion of the meal, this sauce catcher detail is key!

Place the gnocchi on baking sheets lined with kitchen towels, but keep them apart so they don’t stick together. This recipe yields about 3 baking trays worth.

Aren’t they cute? Take this moment to bask in how awesome you are for creating such a wonderful dish.

Turn the boiling water down so there are no bubbles– this will prevent the gnocchi from rising to the top too soon. Add about 1/3 of the batch to the pot and remove them with the slotted spoon ONLY when they rise to the top, about 1-2 minutes.

Place in shallow bowl (it’s a good idea to warm the bowl in a 170 degree oven to help keep the little darlings toasty).

Continue this process until all the gnocchi are cooked.

Top with your favorite sauce and some cheese. Enjoy!!

A good variation is to use half russets and half sweet potatoes, then top with a butter-sage sauce. You can add a dash of cinnamon and nutmeg to the dough to increase the awesomeness.

NOM!…nom nom nom